ASHES

There are just too many thoughts to start off this post. So rather than going on about why I have been away for over a year now, let me just start writing. We’ll get to the being away part a little later. The last year or so has gone by, and I can not thank the powers that be enough for that. Maybe I didn’t know how to do the job well, but it was overall an unpleasant experience, perhaps like a medication at best, that you need to swallow once, but you wish you never have to again.

The thought of handling people’s expectations is inspiring in the beginning. In fact this is why for a long time I thought I could go into politics. But such is the bizarre tale of human desire that I am strongly thinking otherwise. Overall, people lack sense of their own abilities, to say it in simple words, they think too much of themselves. Fortunately for such people, the laws of business state that output has no correlation with input. It’s not about what you sell, but how you sell it. Form takes precedence over content. In such a world a person who is modest about his/her abilities and sets reasonable targets and milestones to achieve is more fondly termed as lack of energy and enthusiasm. Ok maybe I took it personally, but hello this is my blog!

There certainly were good parts to it. Taking a responsible role and executing it well gives one a sense of achievement. Then there are people who strive to make a good career out of a b-school and work hard for it and its rewarding to know that you could contribute in whatever trivial way. Then there was the planning, humungous amount of planning, ironing out each and every single detail to make sure that everything goes well. Support of other stakeholders and the acknowledgement of efforts. All in all a memory to reflect upon, not one to look at and say, I’d do it again.

I guess there is no use spraying away the bad stuff here. To say that it was an uneasy experience should suffice at this point in time. The one thing that the experience clearly highlighted is how much I can take. If this job were the only thing to be done in life, it is very easy. But to handle multiple others things, relationships, hobbies and dreams in life along with this job is what makes it a nightmare.

I never really got around to making a lot of friends at IIML. I always thought I was someone who would make good friends. But my profound disregard for the hungry souls aplenty made me not even try. The day I landed at IIM L, I wanted to get it done with. With each passing day that feeling has become stronger.

I want to write so much more, so many much more. But I guess I just need to make a start at this stage. It’s been a long time since I wrote and its just good to be back live.

Labels: IIML